Monday, February 05, 2007

Am I spiritual ?

It started many years ago when I first filled in the 'interests' section of some questionnaire at some place thats too far back to remember. After the standard 'interests' i.e. reading, writing, painting, travel, music, ( no one wrote 'cooking' those days - just wasn't fashionable enough)..I paused for a moment and it seemed I had left out something important and then I wrote 'spirituality'. My list of interests has grown longer since and I religiously mention 'spirituality' each time that the occasion arises. I Never paused to think what that meant really, its one of those words that perfectly describe what engages my mind and makes me happy and calm.

I was born in a sikh family but unfortunately without any formal education or introduction to sikhism. Going to the Gurudwara was a ritual that I associated with having done something 'good' but somewhere beyond that it gave me a sense of calmness to sit and listen to the the hymns I didn't understand. I really enjoyed that experience and the music. If i had the time and opportunity I wanted to weave that experience into my daily life since just that little bit made me a nicer person to know. Does that make me spiritual ?

And then some years ago I found myself at an Art of Living workshop quite by accident and while my two companions quite enjoyed the workshop, I was devastated by it. Something about the music, the meditation and the talk opened a sea of emotion within me and I felt like a nervous wreck, wasted on life and going nowhere. Was that a spiritual experience ?

And closer to just now, motherhood has changed me beyond repair. I cry with my babies and I feel love multiplies within my heart every moment and that I am going to burst each time I see a pair of sad eyes staring into my car at a traffic signal. I feel uplifted, I have a mission, My own importance in my life has diminished, I just cant explain that state of being except that it feels 'Spiritual'.

2 comments:

rudi said...

Going to the Gurudwara ... gave me a sense of calmness to sit and listen to the the hymns I didn't understand. I really enjoyed that experience and the music. If i had the time and opportunity I wanted to weave that experience into my daily life since just that little bit made me a nicer person to know. Does that make me spiritual ?

Hmm ... Here is my take on the question. A lot of people I know turn to their inner Gurdwara (isn't that Punjabi for doorway to the Guru?) on a regular basis, but are strangely reluctant to "cross the threshold", as it were. :-)

rudi said...

Going to the Gurudwara ... gave me a sense of calmness to sit and listen to the the hymns I didn't understand. I really enjoyed that experience and the music. If i had the time and opportunity I wanted to weave that experience into my daily life since just that little bit made me a nicer person to know. Does that make me spiritual ?

Hmm ... Here is my take on this. A lot of people I know turn to their inner 'Gurdwara' (isn't that Punjabi for "doorway to the Guru"?), but are strangely reluctant to 'cross the threshold', as it were. :-)