Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Growing up with Rayyan !

Little Rayyan attended the first day in his new class today. All through last year he made no pals though I ended up befriending a majority of the mothers thanks to the amount of time I spent trying to make him 'settle' in school and also thanks to the string of never ending birthday parties that Rayyan & Ruhi attended with a vengeance !!

His new class teacher, Ira had taught Ruhi two years ago and is a friend of a close friend of mine. The other senior teacher Geita, I am told is the best at making the worst of them 'settle' in school ! Rayyan is lucky to be in their class and I really hope and wish that he blossoms under them.

We reached just in time but the class was already full of mummys and a few daddys with a handful of boisterous, noisy kids. I could see familiar faces and got that happy feeling of being 'at home'. I realize that after 4 years of attending this 'society' kind of play school I have nicely settled here in my own skin with the discovery that my hang ups about the snob set were mostly my imagination. And that 75 % of everyone is the same under whatever clothes and pretenses they wear ! I have Rayyan and his Class to thank for that.

There were a few new children including a Korean kid with a really long name ! His mother tried to make him shake hands with Rayyan but both ended thrusting their chins to their chests so she gave up. Ira madam made a lot of friendly advances which were met with the same chin into the chest reaction ! For the longest time he sat hugging me tight, sobbing in between and taking reassuring peeks at my face that it was indeed his mother holding him. The other kids were running around, rubbing crayons on paper, painting, snatching toys and I looked around trying to find any others like my poor little scared boy. There was one other who was standing clutching the maid's hand and looking as if he was going to burst into tears any moment. His parents could not make it to school it seems, so his expression was understandable. There was also a pretty, dark eyed girl who looked grumpy but she is the Principal's granddaughter and I figured it wasn't anxiety but plain boredom to be attending class ! So that singled out Rayyan as the only one with real anxiety...I clutched him tighter. After all its only me who will ever understand !

A bit later he suddenly jumped out of my lap as Man Singh, the pottery teacher walked in. He rushed up to him to beg for some play dough and started rolling it into a ball. That was the first sign of excitement he showed and though he sings and dances endlessly to the TV at home, he climbed back into my lap again as soon as the singing dancing routine began. 

As the other kids got more and more excited by the music he slipped out of my lap again and quietly picked up a brush and started painting on the small easel in the corner. He didn't stop till all the dancing and music was over. Then he quietly walked out of the classroom and came back with his hands clean, dripping water. He had walked up to the washroom a few yards away from class and come back on his own. I could not believe myself ! I'd like to believe that its not so much about self confidence, he is just not comfortable among strangers...

After class he had a nasty fight with a little girl over his favorite swing and finally got his way with her. Then he told me I could go and fetch Ruhi (from her old KG classroom where she sat staring nostalgically at her old teachers as new Kids attended their first day). When I came back, he was walking around the play area immersed in a pool of tears. A bunch of kids had occupied his favorite swing !

Another year at the Nursery school ! Another year of growing up for the both of us to do !


Sangeeta said...

Hi gurpreet,
I chanced on ur blog accidentl (hopping blogs) but am glad i did. I'm have a 2 yr old and am already nervous abt doing the entire.schooling process. ur blog made me laugh and cry:)
keep writing
new delhi

~nm said...

:) Even I'm going through just-in-school phase with my son. So it really was good to read your experience too! :)

So which school does he go to? mine goes to Bluebells.

the mad momma said...

well there is hope for me yet i suppose. :)

Poppins said...

Ouch that sounds familiar. Wish I could say something useful instead of repeating myself. After reading your posts I have more so started looking out for ways in which I can help prep my own daughter up to be more confident among strangers.

I'm confused about what you said regarding his self confidence though. To be in your own element and not be afraid of a new situation isn't that the very definition of self confidence?

How can stranger anxiety (beyond the expected age of 7-18 months) not be a lack of a little self confidence? I understand that nature plays a huge role, but surely we must be able to do something about it to nurture their self confidence? Question is what?

Not to upset you, just thinking aloud.

I loved what you said about 75% of us being the same under all our pretenses and clothes. It's the one thing I love about blogging, I just hear your thoughts instead of judging you by your dress sense. It gives me the confidence to strike up a conversation with whomsoever I please without worrying about how I look.

Now THIS is what we need to somehow transfer to our children so they can do it in real life. *Sigh*